~Highlights From 2017~ 2018 is Almost Here!

2018 is almost here! It’s hard to believe that 2017 is about to come to a close. Reflecting back over the year… It was a good one 🙂 So much happened. It started off super rough. I was so done mentally, done with being lonely and feeling sorry for myself. The resolution I made for 2017 was to have a better year than 2016. But then it all turned around and ended up as a year that will be very special for a long time ^_^

Here’s some of the my highlights of 2017 🙂

  • My trip to Missouri. Even though it was really difficult (There was a lot I was dealing with.), it was good to go  spend time with some of my siblings and nieces and nephews. It all was very bittersweet.
  • Camp. Where I found healing 🙂 Everyone that I met there, everything I did… All the fun I had 🙂
  • Co-Op. I’m not sure that I could have survived another year without it ^_^ The people there especially. Everyone there accepted me as one of them without a moment’s hesitation. It didn’t take me long at all before it became a normal part of my life 🙂
  • One family that I and my family has gotten close to in the Co-Op 🙂 They’re the sweetest family. We’re really similar, but different at the same time. They’ve been such a blessing.
  • Theater. That’s one of the classes I’m taking at Co-Op. I wasn’t sure about it the first time I went, but it definitely went up from there 🙂 One of the first classes I volunteered to help write the script. I’m so glad I did ^_^ I had no idea I would enjoy it so much.
  • Thanksgiving. I’ve never really enjoyed Thanksgiving that much, but this year was different 🙂 I did a lot of the baking and helping with preparation,which I really enjoyed. And then we had the family mentioned above over for dinner. We ate good food, talked, played games afterward… It wasn’t anything fancy or spectacular; everything was very low key. It was one of, and quite possibly the best, Thanksgivings I’ve ever had 🙂
  • Going to see Star Wars: The Last Jedi. Aaaaaaaaahh!! I saw it about two weeks ago, so I’m still fan girling about it ^_^ My brother and I dressed up as jedi. We went with people from our church. It was so much fun XD

The Last Jedi-- Blank Pages

holidays aren’t always the best time of the year

Thanksgiving is right around the corner. The stores are already decked out in Christmas decorations. Everyone is in a good mood, right??

Well, it’s not always that simple 😛

For most people holidays like Christmas, Thanksgiving, New Years, and Independence Day are enjoyable times that are spent with friends and family doing fun things. But there are some people that have a hard time during holidays.

I’m one of them.

I used to love holidays. The food, the friends, the presents, the traditions… What was there not to like about it?

Then everything changed. We moved, and holidays suddenly weren’t happy times anymore. I couldn’t get together with friends or family. Traditions became pointless. Holidays (especially Christmas) felt superfluous. It felt like they were there to remind me how alone I was, and how much I missed home. All around me people were with their families, talking about how much they loved the holidays, and being constantly happy and cheery.

4th of July was not pretty either 😛 4th of July was always one of my favorite holidays. My family always had a big party where we would eat watermelon and shoot off fireworks, have people over to our house… It was a big deal 🙂 It was a time that I looked forward to every year. My older brother always was in charge of the fireworks, and he was great at it 🙂

Independence Day 2017… Yeah. No fireworks, no friends, nothin’. I thought of my older brother the whole day. He had always made 4th of July so special. I finally had to call him, just to hear his voice. The tears fell down my face practically the whole time I was talking to him. 4th of July will never be the same without him.

Not having any of that is hard. To be away from the ones I love, to not be able to do any of the traditions I grew up with.

I know I am not the only one that struggles with this. Others feel the same way. Whether it’s because of having moved, losing someone you love, or bad memories involving the holidays.

I don’t have a solution, or an instant remedy that will cure you of holiday sadness. All the advice I have is to lean on God stronger than ever during these times.

What really helps is when those around you are understanding. When they realize that, hey, Christmas is not the most wonderful time of year for some people. And that’s okay. There’s no law saying that the holidays has to be your favorite time of the year.

And if you do enjoy the holidays, that’s great ^_^ I remember those times too 🙂

Those a just a few thoughts of mine. Most of this most was actually a rant that I wrote on the 4th of July to try to make me feel better 😉 But I thought this was worthy of posting.

Bye for now!

~Esther

 

Staying Thankful

Staying Thankful- Blank Pages

I have to be honest, the weekend of Thanksgiving has always been hard for me to stay thankful. Every year on the Saturday after Thanksgiving our family has done Thanksgiving Dinner, with everyone on my Mom’s side of the family. And normally relatives start arriving a couple days before that. And, most of the time, my room is taken over, and just about the whole house is filled with laughing people. So thus I have no place to go to get my “alone time”. It may sound a bit strange, but this is very difficult for me. Being an introvert I can only go with socializing so long before I have to recharge. And when I have no where to do this, is when the emotions get in the way 😛 Last year I had at least one major breakdown, and several small ones 😛 So every year I have the same struggle. To keep smiling even though on the inside I feel like crying, to laugh every time a relative tells me how tall I’m getting, just being thankful on this week.

But this year it hasn’t been as hard for me.

I’ve prayed about it, and done my best to be as positive as I can be.

Ephesians 5:20

Giving thanks always… Not just when times are good, or when you’re in a good mood, always. That’s not an option, it’s a command. Giving thanks always… Saying this verse to yourself whenever you’re having a hard time, or, in my case, saying it to yourself when you’re getting stressed about having a houseful of relatives 😉

These are my thoughts this Thanksgiving, how about you? What are you thinking of this beautiful Thanksgiving day? What Thanksgiving traditions do you have?

Have a thankful day!

~Esther